Christians Acting Like Christ - Now this is News!

 

Unfortunately, we rarely have a shortage of stories about proclaimed Christians speaking in ways that are hurtful and damaging to the very people we are called to love and embrace.   Their words are completely counterproductive to the teachings of Jesus Christ and, quite frankly, to our purpose in restoring those who have walked away from Christianity because of it.

But, alas.  We found this story about Richard Land, president of the Southern Baptist Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission, regarding the Trayvon Martin killing.

Apparently, he made some racially charged comments that were purely based on TV news reports and his personal bias and prejudice.  Below is a excerpt from his "Five-Part Apology";

"First, I want to confess my insensitivity to the Trayvon Martin family for my imbalanced characterization of their son which was based on news reports, not personal knowledge. My heart truly goes out to a family whose lives have been turned upside down by the shocking death of a beloved child. I can only imagine their sense of loss and deeply regret any way in which my language may have contributed to their pain.

"Second, I am here to confess that I impugned the motives of President Obama and the reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. It was unchristian and unwise for me to have done so. God alone is the searcher of men's hearts. I cannot know what motivated them in their comments in this case. I have sent personal letters of apology to each of them asking for them to forgive me. I continue to pray for them regularly, and for our president daily.

"Third, I do not believe that crime statistics should in any way justify viewing a person of another race as a threat. I own my earlier words about statistics; and I regret that they may suggest that racial profiling is justifiable. I have been an outspoken opponent of profiling and was grief-stricken to learn that comments I had made were taken as a defense of what I believe is both unchristian and unconstitutional. I share the dream of the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., that all men, women, boys, and girls would be judged by the content of their character and not by the color of their skin. Racial profiling is a heinous injustice. I should have been more careful in my choice of words.

"Fourth, I must clarify another poor choice of words. I most assuredly do not believe American racism is a 'myth' in the sense that it is imaginary or fictitious. It is all too real and all too insidious. My reference to myth in this case was to a story used to push a political agenda. Because I believe racism is such a grievous sin, I stand firmly against its politicization. Racial justice is a non-partisan ideal and should be embraced by both sides of the political aisle.

"Finally, I want to express my deep gratitude to Reverend Dixon and the other men who met with me recently for their Christ-like witness, brotherly kindness, and undaunting courage. We are brethren who have been knit together by the love of Jesus Christ and the passion to reach the world with the message of that love. I pledge to them -- and to all who are within the sound of my voice -- that I will continue to my dying breath to seek racial justice and that I will work harder than ever to be self-disciplined in my speech. I am grateful to them for holding me accountable."

Now, if only other proclaimed Christians would follow suit.  Now that would be NEWS!!!! 

How has Marriage Equality Changed Your Life, Canada?

One of our members, Kyle Austin, shared this video on our Page this last week.  Hank, in the video, expresses his frustration with the lack of constitutionality and sheer lack of common sense associated with the laws being passed to refuse Marriage Equality in the United States.  While watching this video, we felt the same exasperation, the same bewilderment, the same "What the What" feelings that he was expressing.

Our neighbors to the North of us, Canada, allows their citizens to get married.  It hasn't always been that way.  If anyone wants to know how they overcame this issue, watch this:

And last, when asked how same-sex marriage has changed their lives, here are what some Canadians had to say:

Occupying Iran and Israel - The People Speak

While the Israeli President and Iranian President play political war games, it seems like the people of both countries are reaching out to one another in love.

It appears that those leaders don't speak for their people.



We came across a beautiful Facebook Page called "Iranians - We Love You".

Here's the video that started the dialogue

 

"On March 15th, I posted a poster on Facebook. The message was simple.
Iranians. We love you. We will never bomb your country."

 

 

 

And, here is a response from Iran.

"As an Iranian in response to lovely care of people in Israel, I made this video to show and tell you Israelis that WE LOVE YOU TOO & WE WISH YOU PEACE ALL THE TIME"

 

There was a man who once said, "Give Peace a Chance".

Freely Caged

Every metal wire represents a theology taught by the fundamental Christian pastor(s).

Vertical biblical principles, horizontal truths only realized through faithful practice.  No middle ground.  No black or white.

It's safe inside a cage.  You know where your food comes from.  It comes from the one who maintains the cage on the outside.  They've always been there to guide you and lead you in the truth.  Just listen to them and you will be safe.

You cannot deny the manifestation of the spirit in your life because you've felt it and experienced it firsthand.  So, you know you must be in the right place.

Then one day, the Spirit opens the door.  You didn't ask for it to be opened.  In fact, you denied you were even in a cage to begin with.  But, there it is.  A space without metal.  Open space.  You sit there.  Waiting.  Now what?

The door was unlocked when you listened closely to another Christian.  A gay Christian.  He poured out his heart in a way that touched you so deeply because the scars he shares were caused by you.  Your absolutes ripped his soul and spirit.  All you can do now is cry and ask for forgiveness.

The door latch was undone when you listened to another person who wasn't a Christian.  A person from another faith.  To hear their personal experience with the living spirit of God rings true for you as well.  How can that be?  One spirit?  One God?

The door was opened when the color of the world became gray.

When abortion was not an absolute anymore, but a complicated mess that only love could find a way to healing.

When that person sitting on the sidewalk, unclean, hair matted, and an object to be avoided became a human being to be cared for.

When words were not necessary to feel the closeness of God.

When the Bible was no longer an object to be worshiped.

The open space waits for you.  You take your first step outside.  Legs weak and wobbly.  What do you do now?  You look around and nobody is there.  Just you and God Almighty.  Your caged rituals no longer work to connect you to God.

It's time.  Time to put on the new wine skin.  The old wine skin is old and rigid, unable to contain the new wine that will soon be poured out.

Isaiah 43:19 "See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

by: Janet from CToBM

Go Ahead, Tell Her!

CNN Hero - Pulling children out of Nepal's prison. 

Dear fellow Christians ~ 

This woman doesn't preach the "Good News". She doesn't proclaim to the children that there is only one way to God, through Jesus. Likely, she isn't a Christian. Instead, she is the personification of Love. She is the personification of all that Christ taught. For those of you who cling to the idea that if one does not accept Jesus as Lord they are going to "hell", go ahead, tell this woman she is going to hell. It's time to rethink our interpretation of the Scriptures and begin to take God out of that box. 

Sincerely, CToBM

Struggles....We All Have

Submitted by guest blogger and member of CToBM, Belle Wood

My life is a mess right now. I am in the midst of very trying times. Lost my home to foreclosure, dealing with illness-including these miserable shingles-moving, financial problems, deep dark depression, if it weren't for bad luck, etc. So I have to remind myself of some things. Our lives are lived half in light and half in dark. In Hebrew scripture God assures us in Isaiah(45: 6-7)...

I am the Lord, and there is none else: I form the light, and create darkness, I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things.

This scripture helped me to understand that those times when I am  experiencing the feelings that I compare to the dark night of the soul, those times were created for my good by Most High God. Now, how can feeling separate from my Creator be for my good? Because it is in those times that I truly have to believe that I would seek my Creator even when I am not feeling like  Most High is there. The times when my prayer life seems devoid and dried up, I can continue in my prayer life, because I know that God exists no matter how I feel. 

In the New Testament sacred literature it seems to me that the followers of Christ were the only one's who doubted. The Romans, the Sanhedrin, the enemies, they knew that here was someone who was going to change everything. But, just as Thomas became forever called doubting Thomas, the followers of the Christ had questions. They were right there with him, they heard what he was saying, they saw the miracles,and yet, we see time and again them questioning and the Christ explaining. If questioning continues even in darkness, the answers must come, though I don't have them right now. So, as darkness must turn into daybreak, waiting on the Most High God must be able to survive the darkness. Sometimes it is just the natural progression of light (activity) and darkness (rest or passive)that is normal in everything.

In Dark Night of the Soul (which is a poem and a treatise on the meaning of the poem) St John talks about the darkness as stripping away the ego. In psychoanalytic jargon the ego is that part of us, the self,serves as the organized conscious mediator between the person and reality especially by functioning both in the perception of and adaptation to reality.So John of the Cross would say that 'greater is the darkness wherein the soul journeys and the more completely is it voided of its natural operations, the greater is its security'. In other words, the more of self we are stripped of, the more secure we are in the fact that God is out there.That the planet will turn and the light will follow, and growth will have happened as the natural progression of times of activity and rest.

None of us follow the same path in our spiritual growth. Many of us experience many different traditions in our journey. We are asking questions, looking for answers. The Christ said in the Sermon on the Mount, everyone that asks receives. The word used for receive has the meaning of gaining. So those who question gain. Those who can embrace the dark as times of rest and growth can relax and know that the questions that inevitably arise in these times will be answered. So while I am struggling,I have to hang on, continuing to question.

For more encouragement from Belle, here's her blog

->EB-The Fat Lady's Thinks 

Why so Obsessed with Homosexuality?

In response to one of our member's asking for prayer because he was confronted and challenged by a 'friend' from his college campus ministry about being homosexual, below is a response we thought was worth posting here.

"Dear Friend, I do not believe for a moment that loving someone of the same sex is a sin.  I do not believe for a moment that the physical, manogomous expression of heartfelt love is a sin. I DO believe that we are all sinners in our own various ways and despite that, we are loved unconditionally by our maker. Do not let your uncertainty separate you from that love.

"I have given up trying to change naysayer's opinions on this issue. Instead I'll suggest that for the sake of the argument, let's say that it is sinfull as these people suggest. I think challange them to defend why this issue is of such paramount importance to them. I don't hear these people campaigning against: heterosexual infidelity, lying, tax cheats, child abuse, people who prey upon the trust of senior citizens, domestic violence, financial fraud, etc., etc. 

"The best that anyone has said is that 'well, of course those things are sinful' but no one has given a responsible answer as to why they are so focused on LGBT issues. I have a guess."

 

Since When is Church a Requirement?

I'm a born-again Christian.  Have been since 1983.  Through the years I've been filled with the spirit, with the evidence of speaking in tongues, witnessed healings and words of prophesy.  The Lord has carried me through some deep waters as well.

During the last 28 years, I've always attended a church.  It was taught that we should never forsake the assembling of fellow believers.  Why?  Because we build one another up in the spirit as we gather together, praising, praying and hearing the word preached.

This year I stopped going to church.  The Spirit inside of me could no longer sit in that seat listening to that person up at the front telling everyone how much Jesus Christ loved the world.  Yet, knowing in my spirit that at the heart of this traditional, non-denominational church they would not welcome gay, lesbian, transgender, or questioning Christians just as they were.

I knew that since the Lord moved in my life to recognize the lessons being taught were erroneous when it comes to homosexuality, I could no longer be in any leadership position because of that.  I could no longer share with other believers in church what the Lord was really doing in my life.

When the praise and worship team would sing songs stating that the one and only true way to God was through the Christian God, I could no longer sing in unity.  I found myself out of place in a place I once called home.  I've since come to understand through dialogue with non-Christians that God speaks and touches lives in innumerable ways, not exclusively through the Christian way.

During a conversation thread on CToBM last week in response to Franklin Graham's comment that President Obama wasn't a true Christian because he didn't attend church regularly, I realized that I would also not be recognized as a Christian.  Some of the comments on that thread were disturbing as my fellow Christians sounded glaringly like the Pharisees in Jesus' day.

Since when are there "requirements" when calling yourself a Christian?  Many will quickly respond, as did Franklin, that if you call yourself a Christian, you must speak out loud with your mouth and confess that you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.  Fine.  I've done that.  But, I guess now the new requirement is that you also must attend church regularly.  Oh really????


John 7:24 "Stop judging by surface appearances, and judge the right way!" [Jesus Christ]

It seems to me that the mainstream Christian community needs to be enlightened about what Jesus really taught.  Did He not say we are not to judge by outward appearances?  Back then He was referring to circumcision.  I guess today's circumcision is attending church.

Let me tell all of you fellow Christians out there something.  The Spirit of Jesus Christ, who lives inside of me, pulled me away from church.  He is doing a new thing in me, a "thing" that you cannot see with your eyes.

So, step back, close your mouth, read the words of Jesus, and examine your own life, your own heart, your own walk and leave the rest of us who have been called away from church in the hands of God.  God is more than capable of guiding us, directing us, teaching us, and inspiring us through other avenues other than the traditional Christian gathering.

By the way, that includes your judgement of President Obama's Christianity, I might add.


By: Janet from CToBM

Atheists and Christians, Unite!

Yesterday, we posted the following article about how some Christians were advocating killing atheists because of their lawsuit to remove a cross from the 9/11 site.  You can read the article here.

We wrote the following comment which accompanied the article post: "On behalf of all Christians, we at CToBM want to apologize for these atrocious words of hate and violence from so-called 'Christians'.  We are so sorry and let us clearly state, They Do NOT Speak for Us.  Time to stand up and tell them that we Rebuke them."

Member Lisa Hull wrote, "such hate...how to counter such hate...?

In response, we wrote, "how to counter such hate? Like this -> 'Hey, all you beautiful atheists out there, we at CToBM LOVE YOU WITH ALL OUR HEART!!' {HUG} - That's how. ;-)"

As a result, member Justin Werner posted a stirring comment that we thought was worth putting up on our Blog.

"This middle-aged, atheist/agnostic gay man needs a little bit more than a well-meaning hug.  Platitudes are cheap. Apologies are cheap. You want to counter Hate? Start calling your congressmen, your senators, it's easy to do. Start emailing the White House. It's easy to do. Contact the school boards and schools *personally*. Write letters to the editor. Blog. Demonstrate. Make some noise. Get your church to dispense with one Sunday of sermons in favor of taking *action*. Vague assertions of love, prayer, and big hugs? Meh.

"If you as Christians are not shouting this from the rooftops, if you are not making it absolutely crystal clear to everybody on this planet that this is NOT who and what you are, then you are *complicit* in every act of Hate by those so-called "Christians" who are oppressing people who *aren't* Christians.

"Do I sound angry? I am. I'm boiling. I'm apoplectic. I am filled with the pent-up rage and pain of a lifetime of this crap. Consider [ http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/one-towns-war-on-gay-teens-20120202 ] and tell me I should not be angry. Please, I urge you to read this and tell me to be calm."

We have to agree.  Let's all do our part by doing more than just typing words on a screen.


(update:  Just came across this wonderful blog post that compliments this well.  Christians Need Atheists) 

"You Have Heard it Said, But..."

We are accused of being "False Teachers" from time to time on Christians Tired of Being Misrepresented.  Seems to be happening more and more as our numbers grow.  Who are our accusers?  Fellow Christians, of course.  You know, those Christians who take the bible literally, or at least those verses that suit their belief system.

They don't like it that we embrace our LGBT brothers and sisters unconditionally, without judgement.  They don't like it that we disregard the verses in scripture referring to the word "homosexual" as an abomination.

In reality, we are following in the footsteps of the Christ.  During his short life here on earth, he continually turned his back on those who considered themselves law abiding followers of God.  Followers who knew what the Word instructed them to do and followed it to the best of their ability.

Then comes Jesus, the Christ.

"You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca, ' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell." [Matt. 5:21-22]

"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. [Matt. 5:27-28]

"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery." [Matt. 5:31-31]

You get the point.  So, we say to our fellow Christians who believe we are false teachers, you have heard it said in the bible, but we have been shown by the Holy Spirit a better way.  It is popular and politically correct in Christian circles to take a stand against homosexuality.  So much so that Christianity today looks more like the world than a group of Christ followers.  What is unusual in the 21st Century is to find Christians loving unconditionally, without fear of being right or wrong theologically.  Surely, the Christ will not ask us "did you get your theology right?"  I would venture to say that He would instead greet us with "did you love my people?"   

"If you lived on the world's terms, the world would love you as one of its own. But since I picked you to live on God's terms and no longer on the world's terms, the world is going to hate you. When that happens, remember this: Servants don't get better treatment than their masters. If they beat on me, they will certainly beat on you. If they did what I told them, they will do what you tell them. They are going to do all these things to you because of the way they treated me, because they don't know the One who sent me." [John 15:19-21]

As a Christian of over 20 years who stayed within the confines of what I was taught as sound theology according to literal interpretations of the Bible, I am shocked that my fellow Christians rebuke me because of the shift I've taken toward unconditional love.  Yet, I should not be shocked, so says Jesus.

Posted by: Janet C. from CToBM

Living in an Upside Down World

The following was written by one of our members, Robynne Sapp.  Robynne is a lovely Christian woman enjoying life with Dotti, the love of her life. 

Yesterday, I saw a post on one of my friend's Facebook wall - the one from foxnews by Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church in Seattle.  In that article, Driscoll equates homosexuality to rape, incest, beastiality, adultery and pedophilia.  YIKES!  I had to write a response to my friend, who is a straight female.

Hi -

I've been thinking more about that article by Mark Driscoll and in an effort to explain where I'm coming from I thought maybe I could paint a picture for you.  I'm going to send it to Mark Driscoll as well.  Please know that I am writing this because I consider you important enough to me that I want you to know how I feel and what I think....and what really, truly affects me/us.  Lovingly, Roby.

-----

Imagine feeling attracted to boys when you were 17 years old, but never telling anyone and never acting upon that attraction simply because your church and society was telling you that heterosexuality was sick and sinful.  You were taught that, to be heterosexual was an abomination.

Then imagine spending the next 18 years trying to pray away your heterosexuality.  Imagine dating women because the church and society said that was "the right" thing to do.  That if you got help, you could be healed of your sinful heterosexual feelings.

Imagine being forced into therapy, even shock therapy, to rid you of these sinful heterosexual feelings.

Imagine feeling miserable trying to be someone you are not, day after day, month after month, year after year.

Imagine censoring everything you say and did.  Lying and hiding so that no one in your world would ever find out your deeply hidden truth - that you really liked men.

Imagine getting to a point that you simply don't know what else to do.  You have spent the past 18 years trying to be homosexual.  You have dated women, but it never felt right.  You figured that you could probably find a woman that you liked enough, marry her and maybe adopt some kids and nobody would ever know your truth.  You realize that this wouldn't be much of a happy life, but what choice do you have?  After all, you are a Christian and there are no other options.

You come to a crossroads in your life.  God hasn't taken away your heterosexuality, so you need to figure out how to live your life with it.  But how do you do that when God does not accept you as you are (or so you've been told)?  I mean, it seems to be clear in the Bible, because that's what you've been hearing from the pulpit your whole life, and that's what Dr. Dobson says and that's what Mark Driscoll preaches and writes about on Foxnews.com.  After all, these are educated men.  They must be right.

You feel that you most surely must be an abomination and you think, "How could I go on living with myself knowing that God sees my love for someone of the opposite gender in the same light as God sees rape, pedophilia, incest, adultery and prostitution?"

Feeling desperate for answers you make a decision to go on your own journey to discover what the Bible really says or doesn't say about heterosexuality.  You decided that IF, at the end of your self-determined time of study, you are completely convinced that what people like Driscoll and Dobson have been saying is true, that the Bible does condemn heterosexuality, you might want to just find a way out.  You can't imagine living your life without God, but you can't figure out how to reconcile your faith/spirituality with your heterosexuality and go on living your life with God, so something has got to go.  You consider that the best solution to this "problem" would be to commit suicide.

--------

Fortunately, my story doesn't end like that, but it could have and almost did.  When I went on my journey of discovery (with the help of loving pastors, theologians and friends), I found out just the opposite.  God love me just as I am and that the Bible has been used and misused for centuries to justify horrific acts like savage murders, war, slavery, the subjugation of women, denying inter-racial couples the right to marry, and so on.  It's never been OK and it's not OK now.  I chose to live as the Gift God made me to be.

Unfortunately, there are young people in the world today who will read Mark Driscoll's article and will believe what he says, see no way out, and choose to kill themselves.

Unfortunately, there are parents in the world today who will read Mark Driscoll's article and will shun their gay child and kick them out of the house and family in an act of "obedience" to God.

Unfortunately, there are legislators in Washington State today who will read Mark Driscoll's article and feel justified in continuing to uphold policies of discrimination and deny us equal rights and marriage equality.

Unfortunately, there are extremists in the world today who will read Mark Driscoll's article and go savagely beat and hang some young gay man in Laramie, Wyoming on a fence post to die.

Unfortunately, there is a mom and dad today in Lynden, Washington who might read Mark Driscoll's article and go on believing that their lesbian daughter is living in sin, displeasing God, is equal to a rapist and continue on refusing to celebrate their daughter's loving, committed ten year long relationship and marriage to the woman who adores her.  Because if they do so, they would be sinning against God.

Learn more about Robynne and Dotti at:

Stand Up Speak Out - Two Women and a Poodle

Inspired by Underwear

Tristan running for that hug

In June 2010, CToBM was inspired by underwear.

I came across a blog post that was going viral called "I Hugged a Man in His Underwear Today and I'm Proud."  It was written by Nathan.  The name of the blog was it seems to me.  Nathan is part of the The Marin Foundation. The are located out of Chicago and their unique approach is one that strategically reaches out and partners with both religious and LGBT organizations; working closely with each to make a sustainable, structural difference for the Kingdom in today’s socially driven secular and religious cultures.  Every year they conduct the "I'm Sorry Campaign" which sets out to apologize to the LGBT community for the ways Christians have caused harm and to show their commitment to making things better in tangible ways.

We are grateful for the work they are doing and it is our goal to extend that healing on Christians Tired of Being Misrepresented.  The man in the underwear did have a name.  His name was Tristan.

Here's the follow-up blog to "I hugged a man in his underwear"  http://naytinalbert.blogspot.com/2010/06/updates-hugging-man-in-his-underwear.html

by: Janet Conrad, CToBM Creator

Tribbles Aren't the Trouble, Labels Are

Personality tests. You know the ones. Those like the “Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.” Some people I know fall neatly into one category or the other. Me, not so much. In all those kinds of tests I took, I was usually all over the map. They’ve never really been able to classify me.

These tests seem to be designed to “pigeon-hole” people, and try to put them in neat little boxes.

I’ve found that boxes, labels and “catch-phrases” oversimplify the vast complexity of our humanity. They also, to be sure, oversimplify the vast complexity of our sexuality.

Labels may be fine for canned goods, but not always for people.

I’m writing here what is the most open, public, and personal statement about my sexuality; not to just talk about myself, but more to add my voice to a current discussion that all too often is a divisive “issue.” One that, to me, has shades of gray where many only see black or white.

I used to consider myself gay. Then I considered myself ex-gay.
Now, I’m an “ex” ex-gay.

I’m not really bisexual. I certainly do not consider myself “straight.” Again, labels can be very problematic.

Here’s what I do know: I am a man who has chosen to live in a monogamous, heterosexual relationship with the woman I love.

That doesn’t mean I’m not still attracted to men. Those who deny attractions outside of their committed relationships are often the first to act on them.
Neither, contrary to accusations I’ve received, do I believe it is hypocritical or “denying my true self” to not act on those attractions. Many straight men are still attracted to women other than their spouse. To be faithful to the one you love, while still being sexually attracted to others, is NOT hypocritical. It is, in my opinion, just part of existing as sexual beings.

Timothy Kincaid, over at Box Turtle Bulletin, introduced me to the term “Spousosexual;” a term I believe was coined by Dr. Warren Throckmorton.

Spousosexual: when a person is primarily attracted to persons of the same sex but has found that affection and love for their opposite-sex spouse engenders sexual attraction to that one person of the opposite sex.

Again, I don’t like labels, but I guess that one would come the closest to describing me.

In “Thou Shalt Not Love: What Evangelicals Really Say to Gays,” Patrick M Chapman suggests that sexuality exists on a continuum. This can help explain why not everyone can so easily be crammed into pre-determined categories. Mr. Chapman’s book, by the way, is the single most complete and thorough treatment of the subject I’ve ever seen. He writes from the viewpoint of a gay Christian anthropologist.

[Update: I've since found another simply wonderful book called "A Time To Embrace." Together, these two books are pretty much a complete library on the subject.]

So, anyway, I went through so-called “reparative therapy.” I used to be part of an “ex-gay” support group. I no longer promote “ex-gay” ministries. I did receive some positive input throughout my therapy, but I’m convinced that if the “ex-gay” factor had been removed, the positive aspects of counseling could have been retained. For me, the promises of a changed orientation are, at best, exaggerated. Most often, they are downright harmful.

I personally cannot continue to encourage anyone to pursue any kind of “reparative therapy,” but neither would I deny them their choice, or belittle them for it.

HOWEVER, I must say that of all the people I have personally known who say they “came out” of homosexuality, none of them ever quit being attracted to those of the same sex. I guess I can’t say, as some do, that it’s impossible. That would require me to have all knowledge of all people throughout all time. In essence, I would have to be God.

I can say that in all my years, I’ve never seen it happen. I have seen many who have said it happened, end up proving it didn’t. Many people in the movement now admit that usually, the only change is in behavior, and not in orientation. And as one man from the documentary “Through My Eyes” has said, “Well, that’s just not good enough.”

At the same time, I can not label as “liar” those who claim a different experience. How terribly arrogant, and simultaneously ignorant to do so.

Click here to read the rest of this post by guest blogger, David Foreman.  David has been involved in “church” much of his life. He's been an elder, a co-pastor, a worship leader, etc. etc. In December of 2007, he and his wife finally came out of organized religion. They still function in many of the areas they used to, but they now do so in a more free-flowing, organic fashion, outside the walls of what they have called “the church.” He's not big into labels, but he would call himself a “non-religious Jesus lover.”

Giving Birth

(Written by Guest Blogger, Ellen Fenner) 

Don't get all excited — I’m not having a baby. That’s my gift to humanity. One of me is enough!
 

But if you ever read what I write, you’ll notice a theme.

I’m a reluctant religious fanatic.

I don’t actually want to take part in any of the organized versions but I am fascinated by all of them. Reading people’s ideas about faith and humanity is like crack to me. I’m addicted, and these days my drug is amply available. Facebook alone assures me a lifetime supply — I’m one happy junkie!

But I don’t go in for the hardcore stuff. Can’t afford it. It’s too much of an investment so I get what I can when I can.

I got a good nugget the other day regarding God’s command to us to “be fruitful and multipy”. Most people look at that and say it means that God wants us to have lots and lots of babies (does that mean they should be good at math and not be fruits? After all, “fruits” can’t multiply. Hmmm…. another subject to explore). In a world where our population is causing us some major labor pains, could that possibly be interpreted differently?

I come from a large family. Ten of us, if you include my crazy parents who thought this would be a good idea. You don’t see those numbers much these days and if you do, it’s often within a religious sect known as the Quiverfull movement where women have as many babies as their reproductive organs will withstand (see: Duggar Family. I’m fairly sure that Mrs. Duggar’s uterus must be made of kevlar).

But not all of us were cut out to give birth to human beings. Sure, biologically the goods are all there, but could it be possible that others of us were meant to be impregnated with ideas, or abilities that help us to better serve those whose gift it is to raise children?

I can’t compare what happens for me to actual childbirth since I haven’t experienced it, but my life seems to cycle through “pregnancies” — the initial glow of an idea, the morning sickness with the changing hormones caused by anxiety, the eventual realization that this is really going to happen and I’m going to have to deal with it, and finally the “get this thing outta me before it kills me!!” stage.

That’s the birthing process of a creative idea. Where I have trouble is with the thought of having to raise the idea to adulthood. I know the soul-crushing angst of aborting ideas over and over again so I practice birth control. I sabotage conception all the time. I’ve even thought of just giving birth to a concept and letting someone else raise it but I’m too afraid of what will happen to it if I give up control.

Maybe this is the world we’re living in. Someone tried to tell me that we have to give up all control to God but I just can’t wrap my head around that idea. As human beings we have mastered control over so much in our lives and yet we are just as out of control as ever.

What would the world look like if we didn’t stand in the way of creation?

(Ellen is a member of CToBM, Owner of Ellen Fenner Mural Designs and has her own blog called Downright E-fenzive)

River of Love

"Several years ago, my family and I visited the Grand Canyon.  We stood on the edge of the South Rim and marveled at the vast expanse of the canyon and the Colorado River twisting its way through the floor of the valley a mile down.  Though we knew the river had carved this canyon over a period of forty million years, and perhaps even longer, it was still difficult to imagine that the same water that falls so gently on the Midwestern fields of our home could have altered these layers of rocks so dramatically."

"Can the persistent presence of love have a similarly dramatic effect on human lives, wearing down our hardness of heart?  Yes, of course.  I have seen it firsthand.  Does it happen as quickly as we would like?  Hardly ever.  But there is progress, however glacial.  There is a power present in this slow dripping of grace, which eventually cuts through the dross of hate, revealing the goodness beneath.  Should boulders of hatred attempt to restrict this current of grace, then grace like flowing water will find another path, will over time erode the stone and freely flow.  This is the power of God, exercised not in overwhelming and sudden force, but in gentle and gracious persistence that eventually, but inexorably, makes beautiful the landscape of our lives." (from: "The Evolution of Faith: How God is Creating a Better Christianity" by Philip Gullley)

Our hearts cry is to slowly and steadily show this dripping of grace until the hard hearts of our fellow Christian brothers and sisters come to a place where they will comprehend the fullness of God's love for all people.  May that love remove their fear and replace it with peace. 

"God Said"

As Christians, we like to hoard God for ourselves and lay claim that He speaks to us and through us and it is our obligation to tell the world exactly what He said.  We call it "a Revelation from God".

In the book "The Evolution of Faith: How God is Creating a Better Christianity" by Philip Gulley, he provides a litmus test to ensure that our motives are right and we don't run off telling everyone we meet that "God said this to me".

He writes:

"I ask myself these questions:

1.  Will my obedience to this insight result in the betterment of others, especially the marginalized?

2. Does this revelation call me beyond self-absorption and empower me to love and include others in my life?

3. Is this prompting the most loving and gracious response I can imagine?

If I can respond positively to these questions, I begin to suspect my insights might be divinely prompted.  But because I can never be absolutely confident in that, I hold that revelation loosely, as one would a fragile living thing, not wanting to mistake my will for the divine will.  But even as we realize the possibility of misinterpreting the divine will, this should never blind us to the presence of God's gracious activity in our world.  We never know when we'll encounter the Divine Presence."

Hopefully this helps us to guard our mouths when we feel God has prompted something in us.  As well, may it guard us from others who proclaim that God spoke to them and they feel an obligation to tell us so we will follow it.

Our Own Flesh and Blood

 

The boy in this video is Our Own Flesh and Blood.

We posted a blog article by John Shore on the Page.  Below are two responses we received.

By member Roger Strange-Burlong

"I hear him and I cried watching him cry. I was bullied at school and nearly committed suicide at 10 years old. I was standing on the window ledge about to jump. The only reason I didn't was because I had a very small hope that things would get better, and they did.

In fact I have been through some terrible times in the 37 years since then and that little hope has always stayed with me and has grown over the years, because things have always got better. The reason I was bullied was because I was shy. The bully who nearly drove me to suicide was my teacher.

The reason why someone is bullied is irrelevant to a degree, it is the bullying itself that is unacceptable. No one should have to go through what this young man is going through and there is no reason that makes it acceptable.

Social attitudes have changed here in the UK a lot over the years. When I was growing up one of my brothers struggled with his sexuality and it screwed him up a lot. He still has a lot of issues to this day. He didn't come out until he was 30, he was very much tormented inside and to some degree still is.

The thing he worried about most was how the family would react. For most of us it was pretty much a non issue. His sexuality is irrelevant to me. In more recent times my son who is bisexual has had no problems. He not so much came out as it was just a normal part of life for him. He told me casually in conversation over dinner about his sexuality. It had about the same impact on me as 'I like dogs!' or 'Red is a really cool colour!'

I was interested because it is part of who he is, but other than that it is not important. My only concern was that he might get bullied. Turns out he never has been. All of his straight male friends accepted his sexuality and his friendships stayed unchanged. He is now 23 and still has not had any problems due to his sexuality.

The USA on the other hand on a social level is way behind us on sexuality, as it is on many other social issues. For example routine infant circumcision was stopped here in 1949 because it is medically unnecessary.

But I do see change coming in the States, and it does usually catch up with Europe eventually, so I have hope that within a generation that young people in the USA will no longer have to go through such cruel bullying just because of who they are.

Just a side thought on the evangelical angle, I have heard some say 'well it is not surprising he hates himself as he knows what he is doing is wrong!'

Dogma and doctrine are hard to change, but Christians Being Tired of Being Misrepresented is a good place to start and for us to have our voices heard.

'A person's sexuality is only important if you want to have sex with them!'

As for sex outside marriage. Same sex marriage is due to come into full affect in 2015 in the UK. But we do have civil partnerships right now."

By an Anonymous Member

"I can't stop crying as I know and feel his pain as I and many others have been bullied, not just at a young age but at whatever age we are today. In fact I just had many from the Fundamentalist side attack me this past week over the thanksgiving holiday. I would love to tell you it did not hurt, as it did, but thanks be to God for His faithful love I can and do overcome it. May God bless any of you who are being assaulted or bullied and May you draw close to Him who loves you dearly."

------
Isaiah 58:6,7 "is not this the fast that I have chosen: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the bands of yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every enslaving yoke?  Is it not to divide your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house - when you see the naked, that you cover him, and that you hide not yourself from the needs of your own flesh and blood?" 



Dear Fellow Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

Is it not time to stop hiding ourselves from the pain all around us?  That pain may very well be caused by our lack of interest, our lack of understanding, our lack of compassion, our lack of listening.  Are we so afraid to being theologically correct that we forget that a human being is hurting next to us?  Wake-Up fellow Christians.  Do you not know that while holding tightly to your theology you are oppressing another human being?  Is that the fast our Lord would have for us?  You are fasting (separating) to keep yourself pure from the "evils" of this world, when in fact, you are a direct participant to that evil.  Wake Up! We are commanded not to hide ourselves from the needs of others.  Scripture does not differentiate the color, age, size or gender of that "other".  It is time to begin to feel our own flesh and blood.  The flesh and blood we have been hurting, bruising, rejecting, hating.  It is time, fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, to repent - yes - it is us that need to repent.  We must ask Jesus Christ to forgive us for our fear, our lack of understanding, our numbness to the needs of others, the damage we have done.  Dear God, forgive us.

Hell No!

I share the following video (shared with me by one of my FB friends) because I am frequently asked, "Where might I go to read scholarly and understandable work that will help me articulate what is happening within me and around me?" 

What appears as a "new spirituality" is not new at all. It's been around for eons. What religion has done, however, is to attempt to incarcerate, and then to fossilize, around a narrow understanding of spirituality, as well as God.

But, as we are witnessing all around the globe and among all religions, is that the Divine will be bound by no tradition and no single way of understanding or experiencing divinity. I like the freedom to think, to experience, as well as to appreciate, what my tradition has taught me about knowing God.

I know that, not everything about Egypt was evil to the Israelites when Moses gave them their freedom to venture to a new land. So, I encourage you to be grateful, not hateful, toward the spiritual tradition in which you were raised.

Be grateful for new ways of experiencing God and of articulating that spiritual experience, too. Be grateful for your freedom, but don't turn it into another incarceration - the writings of Spong and Borg will help you avoid this, while maintaining a healthy appreciation for Divine truth expressed in and through ALL spiritual traditions.  [Steve McSwain]

 

You can find more insightful commentary and inspiration from Steve at: http://www.stevemcswain.com/ 

Check out his blog at: http://www.stevemcswain.com/blog

Who Are We?

A member of our Page asked the following question;

"I have a (possibly daft) question: How many people who follow this page/group are actually church-going, living, practicing Christians? Just, I've been following this group for over a month, and I'm a tad confused......I've read this group's description info, but still can't fathom whether this is an e-meeting point for Christians with certain ideals or something else..... :o)"

So, this was our response;

"I guess I'm confused by the question. Many here do attend church regularly, some do not either by choice or lack of options that suit them. However that doesn't make a Christian. Those of us that are Christian here would agree that we are living, practicing Christians. So I guess that is what confuses me by your question. I think our description info, ThisWeBelieve, and Our Posture pretty much states what we believe Christianity to be.

"We welcome ALL people who also feel, as we do, that the evangelical right-wing is NOT indicative of Christianity nor do they represent us as Christians. We also feel that, unlike many other Christian pages, we are firmly making sure that this page is a safe place for those that have been shut out by those very churches and right-wing Christians. We accept and affirm LGBT people as we believe they are children of God as well. We don't buy into the 'love the sinner, hate the sin' here. We also welcome and support those that are non-believers. They also have been treated pretty badly and lied about by right-wing Christians. So I'm just not sure what your question is.

"We are different things to different people. For some we are a safe haven from the Christians that have maligned and abused them. For some we are a place of fellowship. For some we are inspiration for them to follow and learn more about Christ's teachings. But above all, we are a place for all who feel that Right-Wing Evangelical Christians have got it wrong and we are tired of them misrepresenting what Christianity is really about. Christ and His teachings. -(dave)"

Just in case you were wondering..........

God in a Box

Nathan Lang, president of Raindance Productions and a partner in Spot 82 Pictures contacted Christians Tired of Being Misrepresented last week. Seems like we have much in common.

He is currently writing, directing and co-producing God in the Box.  God in the Box is a documentary film, which explores the mystery and controversy behind what God looks like and means to us as Americans in the 21st century. In the midst of today’s fractured and confusing claims on God, the film asserts two basic questions:

What does God mean to you? What does God look like, to you?

The filmmakers embark on a cross-country journey with their small, mobile studio (and main character), The Box. They invite people to step inside and share what they see in their mind’s eye, and if possible, draw what God looks like to them. Along their journey, the filmmakers set The Box up on iconic street corners and diverse locations across America.

A remarkable collection of scholars, archeologists and religious leaders help examine the material and put it into a historical and relevant context. The surprises and revelations about our current interpretations of God come to light, as small glimpses inside the minds of others helps illuminate a much bigger picture.

What a wonderful concept, finding out that God doesn't just live inside a Christian box or a Muslim Box, or a Religious Box.  God lives in human hearts of all shapes, sizes and colors.

Take a moment and watch the Videos.  Maybe you'd like to get involved.

Will the Real Christian Candidate, Please Stand Up

Jesus and the Woman at the Well

I voted for George W. Bush.  Not just once, but twice.  Why?  Because at that time, the only thing that mattered to me was that he publicly professed to be a Born Again Christian, Pro-Life and Pro-Traditional Marriage.  That was the only criteria I needed to make my choice.

Looking back now, I realize how naive I was to think that a man who made those proclamations would represent me and my Christian faith.  So, what is the real test of a Christian Candidate?

Jeff Fulmer, author of the book, "Hometown Prophet", wrote a blog article called, "The Real Christian Candidate".  In it, he outlines 9 areas that a Presidential Candidate can be measured with when "proclaiming" to be a true Christian.

#1 - End Wars

#2 - Have compassion for the sick and desperate.

#3 - Being on the side of the poor.

#4 - Do not coddle the rich and privileged.

#5 - Protect the treatment of foreigners.

#6 - Respect other faiths without being threatened by them.

#7 - Stop judging your opponent, but focus on your strengths.

#8 - Take our responsibility to be stewards of the earth seriously.

#9 - Expect to be persecuted knowing that Jesus was falsely accused.

I wish I would have taken the time use this measuring stick in 2000 and 2004.  You can bet I will in 2012.

You can read Jeff's full article here:  "The Real Christian Candidate"

Posted by: Janet from CToBM